Feb 7
Today I had a conversation with my meh and (i think) she was telling me that she used to drink a lot but now she can't because she gets super drunk. she acted out super drunk but closing her eyes half way and crawling around. Then she showed me some Hong Thong which I thought was Thai whiskey but apparently it's not its a mixture of things but basically its terrible whiskey. She said when we go to the wedding she will drink a little bit with me. I thought that was super cute. Also it was extra cute because it was just me and her in my bedroom. It was like we were having a sleep over and she was telling me her secrets.
Also totally in the family now bc yaai has decided she can walk around topless for a while after the shower and its cool. Its happened multiple times now so I know its not just a mistake. However tonight she was a little embarrassed because she didn't have her teeth in. Its all relative here.
Also my mom just came into my room and told me to put prickly heat(basically icey hoot. actually icy hot too good too correct it) on my boobs and then proceeded to demonstrate on herself. I'm pretty sure I'm in.
Feb 9
Today I woke up at 5 am to fire crackers for chinese new year. New plan for waking up freshman during RF.
I just had to share with someone. It is 8:55 on Saturday night and I'm sitting in my room alone drinking a warm 20 oz beer. I am 27 and apparently I have to be home by 6 pm every night. I feel like I'm 12.
Feb 10
I went to my first funeral today. Apparently I only went to the first part of the the first funeral today. Last night out neighbor died. She was 80. so we went over there in the afternoon and said hi and I watched some guys play a card game a bet a bunch and drink beer all the while wish I could and also knowing there was no way in hell. Anyway we hung out for a bit, I got introduced to everyone and one lady tried to teach me to dance. Some people tried to speak thai to me, most people started at me. One kid told me his name and then was staring at me awkwardly for a while and then proceeded to do the universal sign for death, slitting his throat. So yeah, I thought it was a really positive experience over all and came back to my house thinking that that wasn't like anyone else's experience of a funeral that I'd heard of but it was okay because it was fun and low key and actually didn't seem like a funeral at all. Noone even talked about who died or anything. Basically it seemed like we just went to a friends house that happened to have a lot of people over. So I'm a little confused but I decide it doesn't really matter because I had a fun time and possibly experienced a funeral.
So, I was wrong. This evening there was a fairly sudden whirl wind of activity right around when dinner usually starts and I was told to stop doing my homework and take a shower. Unclear of what was going on and figuring I could probably use a shower I just decided to follow orders. I got out of the shower and was told to go into bpaa's room and she was handing me white tshirts that looked and she was telling me I had to wear white or black. This is the point that I realized that maybe that thing I went to earlier was not the funeral. It was in fact just the house that the future funeral would be at. So I got dressed after a 'conversation' between me, my mom, my bpaa and my saao that lasted longer than I would've liked about whether or not it was better to wear my black skirt and white polo (more riap roy for a funeral) or my brown pants and my white polo(not really funeral attire but there better protection against mosquitos). It was decided (for me) that I was going to wear the brown pants because I should probably wear the black skirt tomorrow. This was the first I was hearing about multiple days. I knew Thai funerals lasted multiple days(typically 3) I guess but I didn't think I would go to all of the days. I guess I assumed there were multiple days so that everyone could come visit but I didn't think that anyone except very close people would go everyday. Anyway, so I then have to put on mosquito spray and stuff and get ready to leave and my bpaa says I should change my shoes because they are too nice because we are going the back way, aka through the bushes. So basically we go over there and interestingly enough I am now not really introduced to anyone. In total there are probably about 100 people there and over the course of an hour we all pay respect to the body(that is in a casket) by going into the room and wei-ing and lighting incense as an offering and find ourselves a chair. Then the monks arrive and chant for about half an hour and we all are holding our hands in a lotus prayer shape(fingertips together but palms apart) for most of that time and periodically(I just took my cue from the people around me) we bow our head and raise our hands to perform a wei. Immediately afterwards we ate a bowl of soup and left. It was a very interesting experience and I'm interested to see what the other days of a funeral entail.
Things I learned today:
- My stomach is not racist because it hates fast food in thailand just as much as fast food in america but the french fries and the chocolate dipped vanilla cone were totally worth it.
- My uncle has a Canon D70 that the company bought for him. So apparently my family is loaded.
I miss portland. Not like I wanna come home miss portland, but I do miss everyone and being able to go where I want when I want. And to be able to know what I'm getting before we've even decided where we're going because it will inevitably be one of the usual four closest/best places and I know their menus well enough that I already know what I want. But really I just miss having close friends. You all know who you are and you're irreplaceable but at this moment in time I really wish I had someone who could fill your shoes. And in all honesty I couldnt ask for anything more from my friends here. They are incredible. It's just that none of them know why I have a scar in the middle of my back let alone having been there to witness me falling into the bbq. So today I'm missing the people that just know when I'm not quite on and will check in. I feel so silly even being sentimental at this stage of the game but here I am.
Feb 13
Today was a good day. Most days are good days here but today was especially good.
Language class was hilarious. between our ahjaan saying hip.p.p.potamus and mamie finding taint in the Target(our daily morning ritual) and Sasha joking about how even though she tried rubbing it(her seat cushion) it still didn't get hard I was laughing pretty much all morning. So just a shout out to my language group. you guys are the best and even with the switch up of our ahjaan I look forward to the daily giggles in our language group and of course the Target. Also one of the things I learned today is that Andy is an Aquarius and I will not forget it this time (like he does EVERY morning).
Also today I learned my yaai loves beer and we drank a shot of beer together. It seems as though she drinks beer like americans drink hard alchohol. She filled up a glass and took a shot and kinda swished it around in her mouth and swallowed it. When I simply took a sip she looked very impressed and proceeded to have the last sip within the glass and that was the end of drinking for the evening.
Also today I had a conversation with molly's dad who usually doesn't really talk to any of us farangs.
Also today I taught Om(molly's little bro) the words hands, knees and feet. and he was super excited.
Also today I'm going to the fourth day of a funeral aka the fun day. Full of dancing and food and beer and I am going to take all the pictures.
Also tomorrow I get to teach people. I'm super excited.
Today I went to a way to celebrate a woman's life. I went in with mom and immediately went to the kitchen with mom to hang out with the other women because the men were playing cards and drinking. We hang out the ask questions that I'm not sure about. At one point I'm pretty sure they are asking me if everyone in america has big boobs. I responded with lots of people in america have big boobs but I don't have them so everybody doesn't. They thought that was the funniest thing they had ever heard.
During the ceremony I originally sat with meh on the ground but then all the yaais moved around so that I could have space on the one bench that they were all on(there were a bunch of people on plastic chairs too so I'm unclear as to why anyone was on the floor but I think it ws the front row seating). so once again we go through about an hour of prayer which I'm pretty used to now that I've been doing it for four days straight. I wei when the people next to me wei and thats pretty much how it goes. Today was different though. About half way into it the monks stop for a break(normal) and then everyone starts talking(normal) and then the yaai's are talking about whether or not they are going. My yaai wasn't so I assumed I wasn't. My arm was grabbing and I was pulled up to the area where the monks were sitting. I followed the yaai that brought me up there and one of the monks kept pointing to me. I thought that was weird and a little inappropriate not to mention very un monk-like. I quickly realized that I was going up there because I was going to be one of ten people at the funeral to give the offerings to one of the monks and he was really just helping me as best he could. So I stood in front of him(already crouched because you show respect to people by crouching when close to them) and he mimed to pick up this decorative bowl kinda thing which I then placed on his handkerchief(It may be disrespectful to call it that and I'm not trying to be but I think it might've just been his hanky) and he accepted. AFter that we sat down and with all the yaais touching the bottle we poured water from a bottle into a bowl while the head monk was chanting. the interesting thin about that was that we all had to be touching the bottle while we poured it. Also I'm pretty sure it's like holy water because one of the women asked if we had this in america and I said, 'chai, dtee mai for buddhism'(I'm getting really good at my thailish) and she couldn't understand me(I was trying to say, yes but not for buddhism) So then I said christian and she looked at me with a blank look then I said chris tea an and they said, oooooh, chris tea an mii chai(oooooh christians have yes). There are a lot of words like that here where you think they are the same words until you say them to a thai person and they have no idea what your saying and then you say it with weird pauses throughout it and they understand completely.
for example:
s traw brrr eeee = strawberry
s pain = spain
aw pear ahhh = opera
Feb 14
Today I realized that last night the reason that everyone was looked at me all weird when I said thank you and wei'd was because I did not in fact say thank you and wei. Instead in response to you are very pretty, I said, 'family' and wei'd(bowed) to them. It made absolutely no sense and they all looked at me accordingly and then moved on. I kept trying to figure out what was so wrong and I realized it last night as I was going to sleep.
Feb 17
OMG my family is so cute. Its hard to write every day because as soon as I start writing I get all into it and want to tell everyone all the things that happened that day that were awesome or weird or not really important but a great little moment and then I realize it's 10:30 and I have to be up super early for another day of training or thai or teaching or whatever. I keep thinking it will be better at site but I'm not sure thats true because I'm sure I will want to live my life and not simply write about what I've already lived.
So anyway, I just had a really cute moment with my mom and sister. Earlier today we were talking about coins because Shy loves coins and I told her that I have a bunch from America because I didn't clean my bag before I came here. She was very excited and I had totally forgotten until dad cleared out his pockets full of change. I got my bag of annoying coins and showed my mom and shy and they loved them. I tried to give them the names of each one and how many cents they were and that 100 cents were a dollar and most of that went down the drain. They liked playing the game of hey rosie here some coins how many is it? oh its 35 cents. now make it a dollar. So anyway at the end shy came up to me and gave me 10 baht and asked me how many cents that equaled and I said about 33 and she asked if she could have 33 cents. I was already planning on giving them the whole thing and thought I had said that so I had to ask to make sure I understood her question and I said she didn't need to give me the baht because I couldn't use this money and I didn't want to carry it around for the next two years. Both Shy and mom would not accept it so mom gave me 20 baht which I accepted because it was the only polite thing to do and because I was pretty sure I gave them about 3 dollars worth of change that I didn't want anyway. Its the little victories like giving your heavy annoying change to people who get so excited about it.
Anyway, today I got thai-napped. Its a thing that happens in thailand. At 9 am I was told we were gonna go to the market. I was excited for a family outing so I hopped in the car with my wallet and phone and camera because I had a distinct feeling that I was about to be taken on a long a drawn out adventure. So yes we went to the market. It was lovely and there were all sorts of funny things that I didn't need but should've bought. I passed up a white shirt that simply says 'ALONE.' in solid black times new roman. WHY oh WHY would I ever pass that up? I'm actually serious. I think I might have to go back this weekend and get it because I haven't stopped thinking about it. Anyway there were other awesome things like this:
and these
mostly I like the I am sexy
So yeah the market was pretty awesome even though a bit touristy. Also just as a frame of reference, touristy here still doesn't mean anyone speaks english or ya know you see another white person, it just means there are a bunch of asians(not thais, but I'm unintentionally racist and don't know what race they were) taking a bunch of pictures with their iPads. Also, important side note here: asians or thais or basically everyone I've seen here is ALL about the tablets and taking them everywhere and using them as their camera. I don't get it.
So anyway back to my real story so we leave the market at about, i don't know maybe 10:30 so I'm all stoked because I think maybe theres a possibility that I might get some thai studying and maybe even a nap in today, but alas the family has other plans. So we turn into a 'parking lot'. Now this is in quotes because what we were driving on looked more like a back yard that had trees all over it but the family didn't want to have to deal with dirt so they just paved around the trees that were already there. Now I think that would be fine and all for a yard, but for a parking lot it didn't really make much sense to me. In part because there were trees everywhere. Many times there would be only 3 feet between two trees that were on a diagonal so to optimize space was basically impossible in this garage. Only just now did it occur to me that at the Indigenous Vegetable Garden they may not need to really optimize the space in their parking lot. While we were there we saw about 20 monks and an australian couple and that was about it. There are a bunch of indigenous vegetables though and they come with a lot of indigenous gnats that really enjoy eating them and laying their eggs on the grass all around them. So yeah, we didn't stay there too long although the idea was cool. On to the next destination.
Okay, so now we arrive at the aquarium and the aquarium is very busy yet still has the same parking lot layout of cement flooring with many many utterly nonsensically placed trees. I have chalked it up to buddhism, but I'm pretty sure that isn't correct. Anyway the aquarium was crazy and awesome and they have some crazy huge fish that I have lots of pictures of and I have an amazing video of a spotted moray eel that wont load but I'll put in on fb later. Along with a video of a disgusting amount of fish trying to eat the food I feed them...get excited.
Here a picture or the eel just for funsies though
Also a picture of my mom and I in the 'OK Love' heart leftover from valentines day. Also, really, who wants 'ok love'?
Also at the aquarium with my sister. I think this is a dinosaur but I don't know. More importantly I don't understand why this animal(whatever it might be) would be at the aquarium.
So yeah, thats was awesome. And at this point its about 1 and I'm pretty tired and so (it seems)
is everyone else. My mom asks me if I want to go see the lions because we drove past a zoo earlier. I told her I was a little tired but if she wanted to go I would go wherever. So off we are to the zoo. We went to BIG CAT LAND:
big cat land
where you will notice they have lions and tigers and cheetahs and meerkats and orangutan. In addition when you walk in you will be directed to the australian pony because that is also part of the big cat land. Anyway, the actual zoo part was very sad because all the big cats that I saw were very hot and very bored and did not seem very well taken care of. I also saw a tiger show and two of the tigers tried to strike their trainers and it just made me dislike the whole situation even more. Meanwhile, my family is trying to do this nice thing for me so I am biting my tongue and trying to smile even though it's hard for me to even be near these animals without trying to hose them down and cool them off or just say eff it all to hell and try to break them all out. So, yeah, that was less than stellar.
But then it all got better because I saw the light. The magnificent magnificent light that is taxidermy. Taxidermy is an amazing thing and I think the best thing about it is that the worse it is the better it is. Check out these examples:
and my awesome mom
Also, apparently in thai zoos they have guinea pigs. Like lots of them. And bunnys. I felt weird about it.
Also, I got this picture just for Molly. There is a video forthcoming on fb.
So yeah we left the zoo and went to eat because we hadn't eaten since breakfast and it was 4. On the way back to the car we went to my aunts friends house spent about 45 minutes there because that's what you do. Or maybe it was planned, I had no idea, I just knew that at this point I was along for the ride and really hoped the ride would stop soon. Then after the compulsory do you have a bf question and my normal response that I do not in fact have a boyfriend and I don't want one because I think I have more fun when I don't have one(to which I always get a good cackle) we head in the direction of home. I feel so relieved that I almost let out an audible sigh when the car slows about a minute later. I learn we are stopping at the food market to get stuff to buy for dinner at which point I say that we've already eaten and they all inform me that yes we ate at 4 but that wasn't dinner. We will eat dinner when we get home. So here I am now. this was an attempt to waste a bit of time until it was appropriate to go to sleep and now its 11:30 and I've gotta be up at 5:30. I'm out.
also theres business and craziness and I hope I'll be better about being regular but I cant promise things. That said I will find out a week from today where in Thailand I will be posted so you will probably know soon too. Or if you are like me you will hear it and have no idea and immediately go to google and google it and then maybe have some faint idea of what the hell I might have gotten myself into. or maybe not. ok. for real. night.
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